Chapter 18 - VANESSA’S FIRST LETTER
Vanessa wrote after completing the custodial portion of her sentence.
The letter went first to Chloe.
Then one to Lily.
Her therapist screened contact requests.
Lily was ten.
Vanessa wrote:
I cut your hair because I was angry that people compared you to Chloe. I told myself I was protecting my daughter.
That was not protection.
I also used you in videos without your mother’s permission.
I am sorry.
Lily read only that far.
“Did Chloe ask her to protect her?”
“No.”
“So she used Chloe as an excuse.”
“Yes.”
Lily looked annoyed.
“That’s mean to Chloe too.”
Exactly.
She did not read the rest.
At thirteen, she chose to finish.
Vanessa admitted:
The fake releases.
The campaign bonus.
The metrics.
The edited-session plan.
She did not blame me.
That mattered.
Lily asked:
“Do I have to forgive her?”
“No.”
“Can I?”
“Yes.”
“Do you?”
“Some things less than others.”
“That’s not an answer.”
May you like
“It’s the only one I have.”
She accepted uncertainty.
